The Heart That Knows Not Itself…

Today, as I was listening to the Sunday sermon, which focused on Head to Heart, I found myself thinking about something deeper: the condition of man’s heart.

The Bible has quite a lot to say about the human heart, and not all of it is comforting.

Proverbs 11:20 says, “The Lord detests those whose hearts are perverse, but he delights in those whose ways are blameless.” Jeremiah 17:9 goes even further: “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?”

It is worth pausing here. Why does Scripture speak so strongly about the heart? Because the heart is where our intentions, ambitions, desires, motives and affections take shape. What eventually comes out through our words and actions often begins as something quietly entertained within us.

Sometimes, the crookedness of the human heart is not necessarily expressed through obvious wickedness. It can be much more subtle.

It can be the desire to have our name recognised, our contribution acknowledged, our opinions valued and our presence noticed. It can be the quiet need to be above someone else, to receive credit, to be seen as more spiritual, more capable or more important. And perhaps the most concerning part is that we may do some of these things without even recognising what is happening within us.

There is something about this that reminds me of bad breath. A person carrying it may not even realise it, but those around them can sense it. They may continue speaking, smiling and interacting, completely unaware of what others are experiencing. In much the same way, there can be attitudes and dispositions within us that we have become so accustomed to that we no longer recognise them, while those around us may already be sensing them.

The tragedy of a crooked heart is not only that it can deceive others, but that it can deceive its own owner.

Consider Simon the sorcerer in Acts 8:9–24. He witnessed the work of the Holy Spirit through the apostles and wanted to purchase the power to impart the Spirit. Peter’s response was direct: “Your heart is not right before God” (Acts 8:21). Simon saw something spiritual, but his heart approached it with the wrong motive. He wanted to possess what could only be received through God’s grace. He saw an opportunity for influence where he should have recognised the sovereignty of God.

Then consider Ananias and Sapphira in Acts 5:1–11. They wanted the appearance of generosity without the honesty of it. They wanted the recognition associated with sacrifice while deliberately concealing the truth. Their outward action looked generous, but their inward motives were dishonest.

Both accounts reveal something sobering: It is possible to be close to the things of God while still allowing things within our hearts that are not of God.

And this is where the reflection becomes personal. How often do we examine our own hearts? Not simply our actions, but the intentions behind them?

Why did I say what I said? Why did I feel uncomfortable when someone else received recognition? Why did another person’s success disturb my peace? Why did I feel the need to prove myself, defend my position or make sure people knew what I had contributed?

Could it be that sometimes our desire to be seen by people has become greater than our desire to be pleasing to God? The answer is not to become suspicious of everyone around us or start identifying crookedness in others. It is to allow the Word of God to become a mirror through which we examine ourselves.

David understood this when he prayed in Psalm 139:23–24: “Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”

Notice something beautiful about this prayer. David does not ask God to search someone else’s heart. He invites God to search his own.

Perhaps this is one of the most important prayers we can ever learn to pray. We can correct our behaviour, refine our language, improve our appearance and become more careful about how others perceive us. But none of these things can independently straighten a crooked heart. We need something deeper than outward reformation. We need inward transformation.

Ezekiel 36:26 carries this beautiful promise: “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh.”

This is the work of God within us. His holiness exposes what we have become comfortable with. His Word convicts what we have justified. His Spirit brings to the surface what we may have buried beneath appearances.

And perhaps this is what it means to move from Head to Heart. It is not enough to know what Scripture says about humility, love, forgiveness, integrity and holiness. These truths must travel beyond our understanding and become the very disposition of our hearts.

May we never become so familiar with the things of God that we lose our sensitivity to the holiness of God.
May we never become so occupied with building our own names that we forget whose name we are called to glorify.
May we never become so concerned about how others see us that we neglect how God sees us.

And when the Holy Spirit exposes something uncomfortable within us, may we not defend it, disguise it or explain it away. May we surrender it.

Because ultimately, we do not need a heart that merely looks straight before people. We need a heart that is being continually straightened before God.

A prayer to carry:

Lord, search my heart. Expose every hidden motive, every trace of pride, every selfish ambition and every desire that competes with Your glory. Where my heart has become cold, make it tender again. Where it has become crooked, straighten it through Your Word and Spirit. Let Your holiness convict me, Your grace transform me and Your love shape my intentions. May the person I am in private be as pleasing to You as the person I appear to be in public. Above all, may my life never become about building my own name, but about glorifying Yours. In Jesus’ name, Amen.